Lately, I’ve been tired of reading the stories in the news. All I see in the media is violence, political vitriol, and a whole slew of ways humanity can treat each other terribly.
I’m feeling a bit more weary than a 26-year old should feel.
And so I finally sat down to finish the reflection on the first “everyday earth shaker” I chose to profile - the late, great Richard Carlson.
It has been three months now since Richard passed away. A few weeks after his funeral, I realized that Richard was a beautiful example of what I was hoping to explore for this blog series on everyday earth shakers - people who are “the ones who see the world for what it is, yet work to shape a world they know is better, higher, and far greater than what we can imagine.”
I contacted three people who were incredibly close with Richard to see if they would be willing to be interviewed for this post: Phil Anderson, a good friend and colleague of his for the past 35 years; Paul DeNeui, who was a student, colleague, and friend of Richard over the years; and lastly, Jolene, his wife, partner, and best friend for well over four decades. The three of them graciously agreed to share their stories and memories of Richard with me. I was blessed beyond words to spend this time with them, collecting their words and their thoughts on a man loved and missed by many, a man who changed every corner of the world he touched.
*****
Jolene first met Richard in the late 60s in Chicago. She was teaching English, Speech, and Drama at a high school in Douglas Park, and Richard was pastoring the Douglas Park Covenant Church at the time. She had heard of Richard before, as he had attended North Park College with her sisters. At North Park, Richard had majored in history. Richard was highly intelligent, part of a small group of students who formed a “brain trust” of sorts that was into debating the big topics of the day. Jolene shared that this interest in beating people with his sharp mind and arguments would fade later on as he grew into his positions as pastor and professor. His desire to take people's arguments apart changed into a desire to listen to them and discover things with them - perhaps this is the difference between a person who is merely intelligent and one who is wise. Jolene and Richard met in January and were married by the following November. A few short years later, they moved to the west side of Chicago so Richard could pursue his doctorate at McCormick while teaching there. Not long after that, Richard and Jolene started their family.
Transitioning to being a father was hard for Richard, Jolene explained. As for any parent, it involved big changes in his schedule, his priorities, and it made him put certain dreams and ambitions on hold as he got used to parenting. It became easier as the children got older and as he had more time adjusting to being a dad. She shared how he loved playing games with his kids, and he always loved them unconditionally, which helped him navigate the parts of parenting that did not come so easily to him.
Jolene paused, then looked me straight in the eye: "He tried his hardest."
Listening to Jolene share about Richard as a father and husband was an amazing part of this experience. After Richard's death, so many shared stories of him as a teacher, pastor, mentor, and friend, but the longest and most impactful relationships he had were as husband and father to Jolene and their kids. Both Phil and Paul talked about how important Richard's family was to him, even though he always struggled to balance work and his life at home. Phil explained this struggle to maintain balance revealed Richard's heart and deep calling as a teacher, which always remained a priority to him. Richard gave 100% to everything he did, which is both an inspirational and a cautionary tale to us.
Hearing that Richard struggled to balance work and his personal life resounded with me...and I don't even have a husband and children yet. I'm barely into adulthood, and I already find myself often torn between trying to be an excellent student, intern, employee, friend, girlfriend, daughter, and sister. There's no way to do all those things perfectly all the time, and I find myself letting work supersede my relationships a bit too much (fittingly, I even typed "student, intern, and employee" first). I would love to sit down with Richard and talk with him about this.
Back to Richard's story.
In 1978, Richard joined the faculty at North Park Theological Seminary (NPTS), just one more community that could not resist being changed by Richard's spirit and presence. Phil Anderson joined the faculty soon after. He first met Richard in October of that year while interviewing for the church history position. Phil knew they'd be fast friends. They both were in the practice of keeping their office doors open so students and faculty could drop in to chat, often stopping by to talk with one another. Phil shared, “I miss those lengthy conversations about literally everything.” Paul DeNeui talked about how when Victoria's (a restaurant on Foster Ave.) was still in business, Phil and Richard would often go there together. They were quintessential regulars with their own booth and everything. NPTS misses those two and all their beautiful friendship brought to the Seminary.
When I asked Phil and Paul what Richard's main passion or calling was in life, their differing answers - when taken together - are perfect in describing Richard. Paul said that teaching was his ultimate call, though being a pastor and an activist were vocations he needed to go through before being ready to teach. Phil said that Richard was a pastor even as a teacher.
Pastor and teacher. Those gifts don't always go together...trust me...but when they do, that person is bound to shape whatever community they are in for the better. Richard was a teacher who never stopped learning, whose curiosity and sharp mind made him - in Phil's opinion - the NPTS faculty member with the most well-rounded education and field of expertise. At the same time, Richard was a pastor whose office was the informal counseling center for the seminary. Faculty, staff, and students were all welcome to come and sit in Richard's office (assuming his cluttered office could hold them at the time!), where they always encountered a kind listener whose compassion, grace, and wisdom held their stories and their pain gently.
Richard wasn't afraid of people's pain and the mess that often follows in its wake. He witnessed plenty of pain during his career. Back in his days as a pastor at Douglas Park Covenant, he was deeply involved in the civil rights movement. He not only marched with MLK, but he also used his voice to exhort the church to live into its role as one who actively upheld God's justice, righteousness, and compassion in broken communities. Chicago has its share of brokenness and injustice, but Richard didn't avoid it or shy away from it. Instead, he was a prophet to the Evangelical Covenant Church (and the church as a whole), reminding everyone that caring about social justice isn't about "issues" - it's about uplifting people who are hurting and oppressed, people who need to be cared for. Jolene aptly described Richard as a “man of all languages,” one who could connect with people of any race, social class, or walk of life. This gift may be rooted in (as Paul shared) Richard's passion for pouring life into people.
We could use more people like Richard, those who pour life into others instead of withholding or rationing love and understanding to them. Richard didn't see love as a finite or scarce resource that we should only dole out to those who "deserve it" or who have it all together. He saw love as something that is both infinite and universally needed in this world. Everyone who was blessed to know him got to experience the love and grace that Richard passed on to them from God, and I'm so grateful for how his loving witness changed North Park, the ECC, and every other community he was part of.
In the words of my roommate and good friend Kelly Perez, "You are a game changer, Richard Carlson. May we continue to carry on your legacy."
God bless you, Richard, and a heart-felt thank you for the way you lived your life. Your life reminds me to not give up on hope.
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